Hi

"Terrible things happen to good people every day. Consequentially I am not one of the good people. I am one of the terrible things." -Marianna Paige
{★} THEME

lanashiftdelrey:

coming out of your room at 3 am and seeing your parents

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love-summer-love33:

I need to marry someone hot so our children will have a 50/50 chance of being hot

alpacalypse:

what can i be for halloween which is sexy AND hilarious at the same time…

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myself

bryanchoppertagteam:

magicalmanhattanproject:

if anyone ever calls you a slut just say ‘and yet i still won’t fuck you’ and then blow them a kiss as you saunter away because that’s the closest they’re ever gonna get to your magnificence, o smaug, chiefest and greatest of calamaties

Ladies real talk

slenclerman:

webabuser:

whoever created chinese food is my hero

probably the chinese

goldenclitoris:

when u know u mama mad at u but u gotta walk past her to get food from the kitchen
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